It has been forever since I’ve written, so long in fact it’s made the task of setting out and writing again even more monumental than it should be. What should I write? A lot has happened in the (more than a) year since I last posted here. Then I thought, just write something. Rip the bandaid off. Life has become so vibrant lately, I’ve wanted to put pen to paper (or, let’s be serious, fingers to phone screen) so many times in the recent months and weeks.
So here we are. 6:35 am. It’s Saturday morning. I’m sitting in bed with a snoozing husband next to me, snoozing dog on top of me and a napping infant in the bassinet to my left. My half full coffee sits getting colder by the minute on my nightstand and peeking over the plaid love seat at the end of our bed is a growing pile of clean rumpled laundry that I need to fold. Sun streams through the too-small curtains I’ve been meaning to replace in our bedroom and it’s slated to be 108 degrees in Vegas today.
Regardless, though, of the heat and the gnarled and knotted laundry monster I’ll have to contest with later – life is good. Life is also so so so different. Two years ago today I was sitting on a beach on LBI, sixth street to be exact, drinking black cherry white claws and waiting for the sand bar to open so Jason and I could get rum runners and hot dogs. Life was also good then. Different.
There will be no beach trip for Fourth of July this summer, no white claws for breakfast or sand bar hot dogs. And that’s quite alright. Our days now are filled with new normals. Mairin. Our baby girl and the sweetest light of my life. Since the beach two years ago there have been quite a few haps (engagement, marriage, moving, etc), but all pale in comparison to bringing this little girl into the world.
I feel like everyone says the same thing: it’s so wonderful, our hearts are so full, it’s the hardest and the best thing ever. While all of those trite instagram caption one-liners about having a kid are so very true, it’s been so much more. At some point I’ll write more about my labor and delivery (horrible) and the last eight weeks (emotional maelstrom), but for now I just wanted to write and say hi. My baby girl is now snoozing on top of me. Her little fingers twitch in the glow of the phone screen as I maneuver my hands to keep writing for a little longer. My cell phone is perched on her back, rising and falling slightly with each little breath. Magic.
She eats again in an hour. Our days are now benchmarked by her needs and whims. She’s been sleeping through the night (with me assisting in pacifier replacement every so often) and has started to smile more and more each day. Our favorite song to sing together is Tempted By The Fruit Of Another, though I only know the first verse and chorus so I can imagine husband and dog are getting very bored of it. Either way they don’t let on each time I begin the song anew “I got a toothbrush some toothpaste..” – god bless them.
Though these days many of my worries are baby-centric, and thus bigger and scarier than before, I still have the same pre-baby scaries, too. Work is never far from my mind (maternity leave ends next month), my health (post partum is a doozy), family (seeing them and wanted them near), seeing friends, and then the daily work of running a house, planning, finances, and all that jazz.
But that’s show biz, baby and with M here now it’s a new season, I just can’t wait to see what happens. I want to capture it all, photos and write more. Hopefully I can keep a steady cadence of posting, maybe it will be on Saturday mornings. Maybe not. We will just have to wait and see.
The Dog Hair Diaries 